Throwing Out The Script

Posted on: October 3rd, 2013 by Dan Saia

For as long as I can remember I’ve always felt a deep call to “do things my way” and not simply do what’s expected of me.

While I may have lost my way at times and fallen into the trap of following someone else’s creed, system, belief structure or formula, I’m happy to say that I have truly found “my way” and it’s easier (and more fun) than I ever imagined!

As you may have heard by now, I recently hosted 100 clients from around the world for three amazing days at my Transformational Author Breakthrough in Baltimore, Maryland.

What I’m here to share with you today is how I facilitated this powerful and life-changing gathering with no plan, no agenda, no PowerPoint, no three-ring binder… nothing! It was one of the most liberating and impactful things I’ve ever done.

But before I share how I did this and the impact it had, I first want to let you in on the back story.

You see, I haven’t held a live public event for nearly five years… because I was somewhat traumatized by my last one.

The day before my last event began; I walked into the meeting room and literally broke down the moment I set foot on the stage. There was so much outside pressure to do it a certain way, to hit particular sales goals, etc. Not to mention the tremendous amount of internal pressure I had put on myself – the wounded part of me needed so much validation and confirmation of my value and worth because I didn’t FEEL it inside of myself.

This, my friends, was a recipe for failure.

Flash forward to last week at my Transformational Author Breakthrough where I’m now much more centered and grounded in my true power, and authentic self. I could feel it in my bones that this event was meant to be radically different that the last one. And indeed it was!

This time around I didn’t let anyone influence me with regard to how I facilitated the event… which would be a deep practice is trust, presence, listening, witnessing and holding space for people to feel so loved and accepted that the breakthroughs simply flowed.

Some people I mentioned this approach to thought I was crazy and that I should never go into an event without a plan. Others cheered me on, and knew I could do it. And, many more people encouraged me to “go for it” because they wanted to know that “throwing out the script” was a possibility for them too.

So you may be asking how I could “throw out the script” and trust that it would unfold perfectly.

The first thing is to make the important distinction between planning and preparation. I’ll share with you the very same thing I said from the stage at the event… which is that I did not PLAN for the event with regard to an agenda or pre-conceived concept of what we’d do once we gathered. However, I PREPARED for months so I would be READY and able to open and let Divine perfection, miracles, magic, transformation and healing happen through me.

I meditated; I prayed; I went through my own healing and transformation; I surrendered to what I was being called to do (or not do); and I reviewed nearly 100 prep forms from my attendees – so I knew exactly where they were on their journey and what they hoped to receive from the event.

I absolutely prepared for them. But I knew that I couldn’t plan anything other than how I greeted people when they walked in the room, and what time my two outside performers would share their brilliance on the stage.

Other than that, my “job” was to tune into what was happening in the room, create a sacred space filled with love, safety, acceptance, understanding and pure presence; and trust my intuition/guidance that I’d know exactly what to do and when to do it.

That last one about trusting my intuition/guidance was a tricky one… because sometimes I wouldn’t know what was coming next until I opened my mouth to speak! Yet even in those moments I continued to feel grounded, centered, loving, powerful and 100% present. Heck, sometimes I even sat on the stage for a minute in silence waiting to be shown what came next.

I allowed everyone in the room into the journey with me. I let them experience a model of presence – and the impact of being unscripted.

For some people this probably sounds terrifying. And for others, like many of the people at my event last week… this is nothing short of total liberation!

Several people shared how sick and tired they were of feeling manipulated, unheard, unseen, pressured, and valued more for their checkbook or credit card than for who they are as a person!

I’m so happy to say that none of that happened at my event. AND it was still very successful for me from a financial standpoint – without any fear or scarcity to get people to “buy.” They chose to because of how loved, cared for and valued they felt.

I believe this is the true power of throwing out the script. People want and need to be seen, heard and loved… and that just can’t be scripted in my opinion!

Throwing out the script creates space for your greatest gifts to come through, while creating space for unimaginable healing to happen for those you serve.

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So, how about you? Would you like to throw out the script… or do you think I’m crazy? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments below.

Comments

comments

34 responses to “Throwing Out The Script”

  1. Thank you so much for sharing this Christine. I have struggled with the formulaic approach I often experience when I attend live events. I have often thought that they has to be another way, and you have shown that there is. What a revelation. Thanks for acting on your own inspiration, taking your own divine guidance, and creating the perfect way to be of service in your own best way.

    • Christine says:

      Thank you Nancy! You know… with all these comments I have a feeling the Universe is nudging me to teach others how to “throw out the script” to be the most powerful and PRESENT facilitator they can be. Maybe it’s time to bring this whole new “model” to life!!

  2. Sally says:

    How important it must have been to be prepared. It’s not the plan that matters but your inner wisdom, knowledge, care and connection to your audience. Christine, you had an ocean of inner riches to share. Congratulations!

  3. John P Gallagher says:

    I don’t think you were crazy. But you were out of your mind. Only by being out of your mind can you be inspired.

  4. Congrats Christine!
    Sounds like a funtastic experience to give your self and others.
    To speak based on pure instinct and spontaneity is a skill everyone should have.
    Thanks for being a great example of allowing spontaneous, loving and caring right action to flow through you!!
    All the finest,
    Raamon

  5. deb lange says:

    i was so excited for you when i read this. I have worked that way on and off for years, throwing away the script, putting myself on the linbe, facilitating in the present moment. Yes, and when i really allow myself to embrace the present moment and allow what needs to come to emerge, yes it is wonderful.

    i like you have been told to have ppts, exercises, materials ready and planned. That is professional training and development! That isnt me i can not stick to the plan when somethibng is happening in the room and someone brings up an important topic and it is important to everyone !

    I also restricted and stopped myself from doing more facilitating as you have to be verry cnnected and i was going through a lot of personal work myself and could not be there for others whilst i was facilitating in that way.

    by the way you may not know this but in professional consulting this is called a process facilitator, one who stays in the present , with what needs to occur and is brought up by the group. i have also facilitated circle dialogues like this with no fixed agenda.

    what i am happy about is that you are a public figure and you are naming this in a public sphere.

    not everyone can do this as yes you do need to be incredibly connected to yourself and spirit.

    i am so happy. it gives me renewed courage with myself to keep on ndoing this and to write my stories.

    i do have one chapter that i wrote about a management team when i worked this way.

    i have many stories to share, so there is the possibility of a book!

    love to you

    deb

  6. I love your idea of “going commando”. When you live and breath your topic, it is the simplest, most natural way to proceed. I’ll take inspiration from your experience and endeavour to let things flow more in my next coaching session. Good thoughts to you and yours, Gabrielle.

  7. Sue Irwin says:

    Christine,
    I think this is GREAT!
    As a transformational group facilitator myself, I can totally relate to both approaches, with and without a script!
    I trained with a mentor for about 15 years where mostly a script was used, but we watched over the years how processes would invent themselves within the training.
    When I went out on my own and reinvented the work myself about three years, I created a new script but had always wanted to be willing to go more with the flow of my intuition and what showed up in the synchronicity of the group.
    This past February the training I do, called Evolution, was more than ever, a creation of ‘relaxing the rules’ and not only did the training show up differently, but of course more powerfully!
    I think it is a great art and testimony to those of us as healers and ‘modern day shamans’ who can trust us ourselves enough to lead, teach and heal from this approach!
    Good for you! Great courage!
    Sincerely,
    Sue Irwin
    http://www.lotusfeatherproductions.com
    http://www.theevolutiontraining.com

  8. Judy says:

    Hi Christine,

    I loved reading about your “unscripted” event – and intrigued. My mentor is a firm believer in scripting and urges all his proteges (like me) to embrace it and understand how much more impact we can have. This is a challenge for me because I’ve never done it, AND when I really tune in to the person I’m talking to (like you did at your event), I usually get a positive outcome. Plus, it’s a LOT of work to script everything ahead of time and plan ahead of what people want or will ask. YOUR way sounds LIBERATING!

    So now, both my mentor’s advice and your experience are ringing in my head. I think they are going to do battle. I have to sit with this awhile to decide which way I will go. I have to say, though, that I LOVE the idea of being FREE to just tune in (after preparing like you did, obviously).

    Thank you sincerely for sharing your experience here. 🙂

    Judy

    • Christine says:

      Thank you for sharing this Judy. You are not alone in your challenge with having mentors teach that scripting is the only way to go to get the results you want. I tried that for years, and from experience I can share that for me, PRESENCE is far more powerful than planning. I know you will find the path that feels most joyous and powerful for you. I had an absolute BLAST doing it this way because I never had to “plan” for what was next… I just showed up with full presence and watched the magic unfold. I look forward to hearing about how this unfolds for you… and I’m here to support you if needed.

  9. Bridgit says:

    Love that you let sprit and what your clients needed guide you. Very brave and I’m sure they felt very loved. Great story.

    • Christine says:

      Thank you Bridgit… yes, the feeling of love was palpable from the moment everyone walked in the door. One of the attendees referred to it as a gathering with 100 good friends she met for the first time. Love is what made every miracle, healing and transformation possible…

  10. Rhea Maceris says:

    I am delighted to hear you have ditched your script …..as I too have taken this Trust avenue & Therefore I get to open more to my guidance flowing through me! Beautiful!

  11. BRAVO!!! and Thank you for this truly liberating leadership. For the first time, I (on the outside edges of your list) can actually believe the words in your header, “Spiritual Guide.”

    • Christine says:

      Wow… thank you Julie. This is a huge complement that you can now believe my “Spiritual Guide” header. It feels like you’re inspiring me to make sure that this energy comes through much stronger than it has.

  12. Thanks for sharing and congratulations on following your heart. I am a firm believer in “throwing out the script” and trusting my inner wisdom/guidance. I believe that doing this brings forth the most authentic, beneficial experience for all.

  13. Thank You! i am so inspired by your courage, trust and freedom. this is what i am going to lean into and rest. what i heard personally was stop the striving and commercialism, there is another way. thank you for forging a path for others to follow!

    • Christine says:

      You are so welcome Marianne! When there is no striving, there is pure being… and that in my experience is where the greatest healing and transformation happens! I hope to blessed with meeting you at the next Transformational Author Breakthrough in September 2014!

  14. nancy karlson bridge says:

    “When I don’t know who I am; I serve you.
    When I know who I am; I am you.”

    This is my favorite coan from one of Werner Erhard’s trainings.

    You, Christine, have an enormous capacity to just “be” and hold the space of the miraculous, for others. In order to hold this space, you have to know unequivocally who you are as a human being at the heart of the matter. You also have to know, without a doubt, who other people are, at the heart of the matter. The magnificence that human beings are is the same. Not everyone can see it and know it to their bones.

    Once witnessed, it won’t always be remembered, but is never forgotten.
    You know who people are and the magnificence that beats in each and every human being. You also know that more often than not, there is “stuff” in the way to people being able to see this fact about themselves and others.

    There is no agenda for this as it can only be known, trusted and experienced.
    Thank you for being crazy enough to trust it.

    I love you and I know who you are.

    • Christine says:

      Thank you so much Nancy. And thank you for bringing your full self to the Transformational Author Breakthrough. I love you and I know you too! Have a blast tonight at the Baltimore reunion… I hope to make the next one!!

  15. Erin Kurt says:

    Christine, I LOVE this!!! I am holding my first event here in Windsor, UK and I am coming to it with this same intention. Okay, I may be slightly more planned, but I truly want to flow with the energy of the women there. It is SO necessary to be authentic, I for one am SICK of anything inauthentic. Your whole journey has validated for me what I’ve yearned to do and now own. Thank you and congratulations on your event – doing it YOUR way. x

    • Christine says:

      Have an amazing time at your event in Windsor, UK Erin! At my event we talked about “fabricated authenticity” and how awful it feels when you just KNOW someone is talking the talk, but doesn’t really walk it. Authenticity is so critical in all we do as messengers… the REAL DEAL is so much better than any fabrication!

  16. Wow! I’m really impressed – it takes courage to give a talk without any kind of script, but a three-day event – oh my! You are clearly very connected to your intuition/inner guidance (something I’m working on), but it just goes to show that part of us knows exactly what we need to say and do, if we only trust and surrender to it. I really like what you said about preparing for months beforehand, as this is so important. Then, when the time comes you can go with the flow. Well done! Go, Christine.

    • Christine says:

      Thank you Leda for your kind words. It was a slice of heaven on earth to be in the flow for three days leading these 100 amazing messengers.

  17. This is brilliant! Thank you for sharing!

  18. Chris Garvin says:

    I would LOVE to attend a seminar like that. You’ve given me something to aspire to — to be able to facilitate a similar experience for others. Beautifully done.

    • Christine says:

      Hi Chris! If you’re interested in joining me for the next one… save the dates September 8-10, 2014… when I’ll be facilitating the next Transformational Author Breakthrough in Baltimore, MD. FYI – you don’t need to be or aspire to be an author to attend… just someone who wants to make a difference with their message.

  19. Sunday Oliver says:

    I have been experimenting with this kind of thing on a much smaller scale (like: not pre-planning a conversation, even a difficult one). It’s inspiring to hear about your success on a much bigger scale, because what you did is also much more natural to me. And it makes sense: events happen in the present moment, and the energies of an event are like water. Instead of a rigid container, this approach can allow for more flow – which is what we all enjoy and are fed by. Thanks for writing this.

  20. Laura Quilligan says:

    Dear Christine,
    It’s truly a pleasure to write to you on your blog.
    I have been examining the world of internet marketing/information for 2 years or more.
    I’m not an internet marketer, just curious, while searching, as a self-employed artisan looking for other opportunities to increase my income.
    There is a lot of strange stuff, generally dead-ends, and snake-oil salesmen on the internet.
    When I came upon your “movement”; Transformational Author Experience, I sat
    straight up in my chair, and said, YES FINALLY, I have discovered what resonates with me.
    Your message and intention aligns with how I view the world. Thank you for
    sending this to us out here.
    I’m reading your first book (or one of them) Freedom Formula, Peebles in a Pond, and signed onto the online TAE. Wonderful.! Positive speakers sharing their wisdom..
    I’m at the beginning of this new discovery with TAE, but hope to develop my
    message soon.
    Happy to hear about your conference in Baltimore! So refreshing that spontaneity
    is alive and well.
    Best,
    Laura

  21. Kathleen says:

    Namaste Christine and thank you for holding this space so others can too! By throwing out the script you showed the Universe that you were ready, willing and open to channel your soul wisdom – you were in the space of BEing and not DOing and so you could open to the flow. We are all able to do this when we prepare as you did. Thank you and bless you for your courage and trust.

    Kathleen
    http://www.kathleenlgrant.com
    Author of “Be your own SOUL-ution”

  22. Tiffany Kane says:

    Christine,

    The event was amazing! I describe it as meeting 100 old friends for the first time. This speaks to two points.

    First you marketed the event in just the right way to attract just the right people, which shows your preparation.

    Second, your example of trusting yourself as a way of being was and is priceless. It was probably the most important thing you taught and I learned. Your example lead to the deep connections experienced by and between the participants in the room.

    Thank you so much for having the courage to do it your way!

    Love and Hugs,
    T

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